Tactical Joy: Why Hobbies Matter More Than You Think

Elliott(00:01)
Alright, what are we talking about today? Man, I had this thought of hobbies. You know, what kind of inspired me was pretty much the feedback from

the caffeine and bourbon and sleep episode we got feedback from people and I think what hit them was, the, the depth of the sleep and how that impacts us in our job. But one of the things that really grabbed people in my mind was the bourbon. You think so? I think so. I think so. So with that, I think let's talk about hobbies far and wide, how they impact us, why we choose certain

mean, I don't think it's really a hobby. It's an excuse for drinking. Although if you if you look to your left, you'll see my cigars. You're a collector. That's hobby. Yeah. And I don't I never considered that to be a hobby.

they're cherished and I smoke them on a special occasion, but I don't know if I consider that a hobby, don't know why I feel like a hobby is different. That doesn't qualify.

I'm going to disagree and I'm going to put it as a qualifying hobby. That's one of the reasons why, that bottle of bourbon that I that I got. Was had some value to it, and I know I wouldn't have.

imbibed in it, but I gave it to you trusting that I'm like, he's going to collect this and hold on to it. And if there's a reason to pop it open, it's going to be a very good reason. And I'm sure I'm getting a phone call. Yeah, right. That is very true. That is very true. guess my my two hobbies, if they are bourbon and cigars, maybe I don't consider them hobbies

they're unhealthy,

I feel like there are vices. Six, one half does the other. right. For this episode. We're talking about the hobby, the art of collecting, enjoying and sharing.

brings you some level of joy, a level of interest and a distraction.

Elliott (02:30)
This is the Maine responder podcast, real conversations about work, the pressure and the lives shaped by service. There's no single lane here, no script, just honest talk. Let's get into it.

In-person participant 1 (02:44)
What are typical hobbies? I'm going to break into some of mine. Let's go. And it's cool. Cause we do have the contrast. You feel like you have a minimal. I feel like I have a plethora, but not enough time.

And why do hobbies like my hobbies that I'm interested in costs so much money.

It's frustrating. One of my big hobbies that I used to do since I was a little kid was archery. OK. And it's been a minute since I've pulled back a bow.

Actually, I don't even own a bow anymore and that's my pursuit is to get a new setup for it

You concentrate, you focus, you breathe, you relax, you pull the trigger on the bow and the arrow goes flying down and hits your target.

I could see that being great. Therapeutic. Yeah.

I'll say it's Zen. You have to concentrate You have to relax a lot more.

So there's a whole level of concentration and focus, mind, body and environment. Wind distance, the whole nine yards. last time I ever used anything like that was, I was probably.

nine or 10 and it was a slingshot. Right. And it wasn't as I mean, that's going grassroots. That's great. what comes to my mind is golf. it's kind of the same thing so I played golf for a little bit, dabbled, took some lessons, got really frustrated with it, gave up, kind of started getting back into it, last year.

a little more fun with it than I did in the past. the reason I say it is because it just seems like there's a lot of mechanics to it. And when you take that time and think about the mechanics and try to perfect them. there's definitely something to that. Yeah. Golf. I love to play golf. I'm not very good at it, but I enjoy the exactly that getting out.

Mind-body connection. You got to this little tiny ball and you got to hit it pretty far and then put it in a little cup. Yeah. And it's, that can be paired with camaraderie. Archery can too. I used to do tournaments growing up

The smoking and joking, you know, it was great as a kid, 12, 13 years old, I'm with adults, my uncle and his friends, and I get to hear how they interact with each other and the, the razzing of, of it all. You know, you can't make that shot or I got closer and that's the difference with archery, you know, versus, you know, shooting a firearm is there's a lot more margin of error.

hearing what you're saying I'm equating it to golf because I've played golf, when we talk about the mechanics, the camaraderie that's around it. That's what we're looking for in a hobby. Yeah. But I got to tell you, man, I got so frustrated with golf I was just like, I don't want to play this and I was playing with people that were just kind of hacking. I don't know. This is my problem.

This is this is my problem. You see, I know what you're going to say. I was playing with with great people. Don't get me wrong. That's not what I'm saying. Correct. But I'm like, you guys just want to come here and. hack the ball around and drink and nobody's actually getting better at golf. I'm not playing this again until I know how to play so I can play right and then start to like focus on the game and get better at it.

I'm out and I'm not. I'm not going to play. I guess maybe I was missing the camaraderie part of it, right? Well, who cares why I'm turning it into something serious and maybe taking out of it, the joy, right? I want to know more about the mechanics. I want to get better. And then the hobby will be.

being able to enjoy that part of the game. I don't know maybe I was just playing with the wrong people for me for my mindset or maybe I'm just too you know sometimes I just have a stick up my ass and maybe that's just it I don't know

you bring up archery and it makes me think immediately here. know, here we are in Maine hunting, Hunting is huge. And that's the same type of thing. people going out. Maybe they take their little ones and they're passing that on. You know, I'm a city boy, so I never really had that. I've been able to, as I've gotten older, understand, wow, this is there's something to this, you know, being out there in woods and.

I wouldn't have really thought of as a hobby because it just was different from how I grew up. But that Zen part of it, man, It's like tactical joy. Yeah. Great way to put it. Yeah, It's one of those things even, tying into the profession.

I've had to learn to, ease down, right? I've talked about it before, you know, I have a certain standard in my mind, the example is how I ruined the game of golf for myself. doing that and kind of getting too intense about it, I learned, hey, just chill out. It's okay. like let those guys have fun. And I can still have that.

like that intense battle with myself to improve. hang on, I'm going to I'm going to sidetrack here because there's something else about golfers. OK, they're freaking liars. It just it just came to my mind. So I have to say it because I want to get out there and play golf and everybody's hey, come out and play with us. You know, it's going to be great. I'm not that good. And I just don't want to slow everybody down.

When I get better, I'll I'd love to play with you, and then they come at me with this BS line. geez, we're horrible. We are the worst, and then I've gone out and I play with these guys and I feel. Well, like they're liars because they're all awesome. They can hit it straight, they can hit it far, and I'm just chopping the ball along like it's a I don't even know. I might as well be freaking doing hopscotch. It's just ridiculous.

So sidetracked, but I had to get that out because every time people, they just need to be like, no, we're really good. So if you suck, get better and play with us or meet us at the 19th hole and buy us around because you're not that good.

So great segue to what I was going to say is you're viewing it from the success

point of view. Okay. The success of golf and what's the success of golf getting the lowest score. However, what's the significance of it? What are you looking at? Are you looking just to kind of get through it and be done to get to the 19th hole or

Yeah, you're not going to be like, used to keep track of my golf score. Yes. You know, you have to write down your score, but my success was rated on how many balls I lost. Yeah, I've done that. And that in itself of just putting that as, as in a success for me helped me enjoy the game that much more.

And on your side of liars, how about that? That's a gimme. come on. Yeah. Talk about pressure. You got, you can get the yips within six inches. Come on now. Yep. That is true. That is true. Or kicking it from the rough. Hey, that kicks a stroke. don't care who you are. So again, no judgment because we've all been there.

How are you compare? Who are you comparing yourself to? You comparing yourself to the golf that we're watching on Sunday. If you're one of those people that watches golf, if we are, yeah, you suck, but your average Joe that's going out there, hitting it, you're enjoying the time with people. You're trying to understand the

mechanics of it and, Ooh, I got a sweet shot. That was nice. Good. That's a win. It's, it's almost like once you hit the ball, you know,

equated to shooting. Once you pull the trigger, the bullets gone, nothing you can do about it. Same thing. You, you take that stroke. It was a great stroke. Good. But the next stroke is a whole new one. Don't go off of that success or don't go off of that failure. So I like those.

hobbies, that allow you to compound and build, but not build off of past successes. Cause the next one is, is different. You know, you hit it into the, into the sand, into the bunker. That's a completely different approach, different way. have to look at it. Tall grass, fairway, it all changes. So that to me.

adds a little more to the foundation of that game that gives me a little bit more of forgiveness. And I think that's one thing that we're both very critical of ourselves and we see the...

I wouldn't say perfectionist, but there's a perfectionist quality to it and that success pose. So look at it from a standpoint of success and significance of, that success. What's your goal for going out to play golf with your friends? Enjoy, have a good time. Then have a good time. you have Miff and you know, skull one, you laughing about it.

likely there you go that's a win if you get upset about it then that's your point of view that you know maybe you need to change to you know for perspective yeah

let's be tactical in our, in when we find that joy and not allow ourselves to, fall down in that perfectionist or, or, or find the humor in those moments, There's a lot of moments where we, where we can't laugh, We have to be serious. We have to, handle business,

know look for those little moments I like be present and make that choice to be happy

Other, other hobbies, thoughts from, you know, where we can go with that. You know, you look at fitness. yeah. Yep. What, you know, that's. Rucking going out for the walks in the woods or wherever we've got some great locations here in Southern Maine that we can take a walk and to add a little extra to it. You throw weight in a backpack, you grab a rock and you go.

by yourself in a group. It can be educational. could throw a podcast in. You can listen to an audio book or listen to music. Either way, you're focusing on something that you enjoy and you're moving at the same time. You you're a hundred percent right, know, a hundred percent right because I didn't consider rocking

Man, would, I'd walk miles. Right. And I'll just like you said, know, put the AirPods in, listen to a podcast, listen to a book, you I would get to a certain point, maybe grab a bite to eat. Uh, in fact, you know this, but I used to rock from brewery to brewery. Great concept. And I, you know, I'd get there. I was in a good spot where I probably had like four, maybe even five breweries

and.

all said and done, probably seven miles, and that was awesome. And you had like these checkpoints, know, you know, so you go up. know I'm this whatever brewery, you know, and I'm going to stop and have a beer there. And then by the third brewery, I'm drenched in sweat. And they kind of they kind of realize like, what are you doing?

and then I could talk about it. this is what I'm up to. And and I did that. I did that enough times where they're like, hey, you're out there walking again, you know, and yeah, I'm out there. So that's a great one. And I can't I can't wait until the weather breaks a little bit to be able to get back out there and do that.

We've actually done it before and you we'd stop and you'd put us through a workout. Yeah. Which was freaking awesome. Yeah. You know, instead of using your checkpoints for, for rehydration with, with their service, we would, break down and, and have a circuit. And it's easy just body weight stuff, whether you have the rock on or hold the rock in a different position, do squats, lunges, planks, pushups.

you name it. Find a park bench or a rock and do step ups. The variety is all based upon your imagination and your environment, what's around you. So yeah, hobby number, whatever, three, four, that's...

There's another one that we just added to your repertoire. I know. Yeah. So you're a hobby guy, whether you know it or not. That's the thing is, yeah. Identifying that. Yeah, I do have some hobbies. Hobbies that you're doing hobbies that you could grow with.

you can combine your hobbies for a goal. You know, and it kind of relates to what we're, what we're trying to do, what we're trying to improve our health and wellness with this.

This is a good conversation because there is so much I guess that I am doing that I'm just not considering. yeah, that is a hobby and I've been asked the question. know what? What do do? are your hobbies?

might even be like a therapy question. Yeah. What do you do? And I'm like, I don't do anything. Right. I think it is a therapy. I think I answered that question. Yeah. And my answer was like, don't think I do anything.

sadly, I always think around work. You know, I think about around work and family. I don't want to seem like I'm that, that deep into.

And so I'd always say, yeah, work and family, work and family. But there's definitely a lot of side things that I do that,

as a hobby, and, and many more that I want to do. just don't know what they are yet. guess. Yeah. I say let's explore, figure some out. You know, I want to get you in that great Atlantic ocean and swim, I love it. That's a past time of mine. I definitely could say that's a hobby and it seems like my, lot of my hobbies are

activity oriented moving. I don't I don't really enjoy sitting too much. Playing games. Yeah, whether it's, know, Rummy, Rummy Cube.

different games of that nature, depending on the weather, if we don't want to go out or if it's a nice, beautiful day sitting at a, at a picnic bench or park bench, having a beer and, playing, playing rummy. That's, that's a fun way to go. Laura and I go to Monhegan Island and that's what we do. We hike for a good portion of the, of the morning. And by mid afternoon, we go to the brewery, we grab a beer and we pull out the deck of cards and we start playing rummy and.

It's fun. It's relaxing. And, yet it's challenging. You're challenging your mind and it's a little competition, a little, you know, spousal competition is fun to put in the, put in the game and we keep, we keep track of our scores and it's always, I'm always the loser. get my ass beat 99 % of the time. So when I win, you better believe I'm doing a victory dance.

There's so many people out there now that are becoming collectors because they're looking for that penny that's going to get them the big score. Whoever thought a penny would be able to turn into a hundred thousand, you know, a hundred dollars, thousand dollars. mean, I guess they're out there. I haven't looked at it too much, but I know my kids look every now and then at pennies and it's pretty cool.

Cooking, cooking, the smoker, I'm not doing it as much anymore, but, know, getting out there and, throwing a brisket on and tending to that thing for, 12 to 18 hours or whatever it takes. That was that was great. That was a lot of fun, and and I miss it at times,

They test your patience, not in the way of, you know, that typically means like annoy you and whatever. just, you sit with it. Non-stress induced. let's, this is going be perfect. We're going to wait. It's, we're going to do this right.

I'm glad that I'm realizing I do have, I do have some things that, are a stress relief, Perfect.

you know what I'm taking away from this? Obviously what I just said, also. Also tactical joy, I'm ready to put that on a hat or something. That's I would would go above and beyond a hat. That's a hoodie. Yeah, Tactical joy, yeah, let's be deliberate about. Being happy, as deliberate as we are sometimes as being negative, because that just seems to be a default sometimes.

it's been a good conversation I really grateful and thankful for some of the messages that we've gotten, people listening to this nonsense. It turns out there's more than two. There's more than two people, more than two. And you know what? This hobby is is bringing me some joy. I got to be honest. Yeah, agreed. Same. Yeah. And you know what we're learning as we go, mean, life is good. Life is good.

it's been fun. It's been from the heart. You know,

i think you know closing points find your tactical joy be deliberate being you know intentional with what you're doing

We've got common bonds. It's not just the job. Absolutely. There's other things out there that are, that are tying us together. So yeah, I appreciate it. I appreciate you. And I think it's a great day. Cool. we'll be back with another one and,

We're gonna keep it rolling. Let's go. All right stay safe everyone.